Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Picture of the day - Hey Teves



A picture i found on the net, the picture description reads as follows: Images of books on shelves are seen projected on the walls of the Tower of David in Jerusalem's Old City - part of a show called "Or Shalem, Jerusalem Lights the Night", staged by a group called Skertzò on October 7, 2008. The Tower of David is a massive citadel that, over the centuries, has served as a fortress, military barracks and cannon position. These days, the Tower serves as a popular tourist site.

I found it appropriate for Hey Teves.

Good Yom Tov.

JIBJAB usually puts things in prospective. in a matter of 45 seconds, they put togeather an animated video of how this past year sucked.

in past years, they would end the video with something along the lines of "here is hoping year (200?) won't be like (200? - the previous year)".

this year's video ends with: "If there is anything I'm happy about, it's that it is all over".

I guess they lost hope, they wish you a Happy new year with some sour face.

Thank G-d we don't celebrate '09 rather '69.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

A full house of Books


Today I'm here to give respect to a man who had started doing something small, that in it's own way changed the way Crown Heights residents and Shluchim think about one of the Rebbe's Mivtzas.

It is obviously Mivtza Bayis Molei Seforim. there is an individual who goes out of his way to keep himself busy and Chasidim happy.

So this Hey Teves, if you are not sure where to get your Seforim, just go to 
http://vaadseforim.blogspot.com/ and order your Seforim.

I do NOT get commission (but i may get less attitude).

Monday, December 29, 2008

I get it


"You remember the story when . ."

- "no"

"well he had green pants and a blue shirt"

- "don't remember"

"and he had that blue car, they were standing in the alley way"

- "OH, I remember".

conversations like that are so common, only sometimes the one you are conversing with refuses to accept the fact that you simply forgot this story, so he will go on and on with dumb facts till you will remember.

or will you??? many times you will give the face like you totally get it, although you have no clue what he is talking about.

Why would you do it? just admit you don't remember! but then you will just here more facts to MAKE YOU remember, so just say you remember!!!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Chanukah Vacation



Due to the early Chanuka vacation our writers took (they pay here ain't that great), posting hasn't happened in the last week or so.

(or due to the fact that i was living off cell phone internet for the last few days).

New updates and posts will resume IY"H right after Chanukah.

trust me, i will have a lot to write after analyzing the world from a viewrs point of view.

WHAT??????

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

A mark to remember


A few years ago, I was in 770 davening Mincha, and i noticed that the Chazzan made a mark in his Siddur before he started Shmone Esrei. Curios as to what he wrote in the Siddur - which belonged to the Shul - i checked after he left as to what it was. I noticed that he made a mark in the Siddur near the point where on fast days you must say Aneinu.

That day was indeed a fast day, obviously he wrote in the siddur, to remind himself to say it, but it wasn't HE'S siddur, what happens if I used the Siddur the next day?? would i maybe by mistake say Aneinu on a non-fast day.

The truth is, that it's not the point what happens the next day, the question is right then and there, WHAT ON EARTH WAS HE THINKING???? It's not he's siddur, he must NOT write on it.

Today i was davening Shacharis, and a kind fellow that used the siddur before me (could of been yesterday, or a few days ago), took initiative to remind Klal Yisroel NOT TO FORGET Vsein Tal Umatar, how? He made a pen mark underlining those words!!!!

But it's just like the people who are Machmir, that if a hair falls out of their beard, they put it in a Sefer. But no, they would never ruin one of their Seforim at home. They just dump it in the nearest Sefer they find in 770.

I guess the Tfillin straighteners might be better.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Man with small brains


Yesterday in Torah Ohr, i was learning the difference between Yaakov and Eisav. Eisav comes from Olam HaTohu - small Keilim and large Oros, so the Keilim can't contain the Or.

Simply put - writes the alter Rebbe - it's like a man with small brains, The light of intellect can't shine through it. In a practical sense; he becomes narrow minded, his brain cannot handle two apposing facts. he cannot see both sides of an argument.

I pointed out to my Chavrusa, that here the alter rebbe uses the term - MAN with small brains (really it's not actually 'brains' rather 'Seichel [שכל]), not like in Tanya where the Alter Rebbe uses the term CHILD.

If someone does something bad (or good, if you like to be cynical), there is always another side to the story.

If you disagree - you're just another Eisav. A man with small Seichel!

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Where buy?


As a city boy, you never have an issue, whatever you need there will be a 24 hour store in the area that carries it.

You're never worried about an emergency battery crises at midnight, or that you will NEED a cold beer, there is always a store that carries it.

But a few days ago, a friend asked me where he can find a pillow in Crown heights. I told him to take the subway to Atlantic Ave. and go to Target, however he was certain that he can find one in the Shchunah.

I wanted to see how it will turn out. After a long run up and down, I realized, that the Shchunah still needs a few essential stores.

Start with a Starbucks, apple store and then a store that carries pillows. but i guess that if you want a pillow, the store doesn't have to be open for 24 hours . . .

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Hierarchy


It's just the way the world was created, chances are you work for someone else, why? well in some cases it's because you need someone on top of a lot of people, makes sense.

However in many cases the guy on top has someone on top of him and that guy someone that is his boss, and each boss is responsible only over ONE person, that makes you think that maybe these nerds just need a job...

Other times the boss is actually needed, however he is so happy with his job description 'principal' that he doesn't actually do anything.

So yes, the hierarchy has to continue, but the one on top has to know that he IS replaceable!!!

(this is for those that go on released time, and instead of HELPING the other Bochur, they do all their phone calls at that time. You might be IRREPLACEABLE, but respect your commitment)

more the merrier

Something to think about ......
You know what would really PISS OFF the Democrats...
Bush should resign now.
Then Dick Cheney becomes President (that would really PISS OFF the liberals)!!!
Then he appoints Condoleeza Rice as VP.
Then Cheney resigns two weeks later and Condoleeza Rice, A Republican,
becomes the first BLACK President and the first WOMAN President !!!

I Hate my dentist ...


Don't know why, when your younger, every day you go to the dentist, oh, you have a day off next Wednesday - let's go to the dentist.

No matter what you do at the dentist, it hearts. Where else does it hurt to take a picture??? everything they put in your mouth has DD (check the psynamWIKI for more on DD), and tastes like an entire old age home, but YOU GOTTA GO TO THE DENTIST.

Oh, the dentist is much like you teacher; always right, not just the usual rants ("You don't brush your teeth", "You don't floss correctly", "You say you already HAD braces???", "I recommend teeth whiting NOW"). but they also have an opinon about the world: "You shouldn't smoke", "You drink???", "Smicha is a waste of time" etc.

To remind you; dentist failed med school!!!

But then you grow up, you visit the dentist when the economy is down just so that they can claim money from your insurance for the "annual checkup".

So why do they always HAVE TO find something wrong?!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

something funny 2 lighten it up

after all the crying bawling etc. i thought hey how about a good joke that would get us bomping back into seder uchdilikamon-
A woman in a hot air balloon realizes
she is lost. She lowers her altitude

and spots a man fishing from a boat below.
She shouts to him, 'Excuse me,
can you help me? I promised a friend
I would meet him an hour ago, but I
don't know where I am.'

The man consults his portable GPS and replies,
'You're in a hot air balloon,
approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation
of 2346 feet above sea level.
You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north
latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09
minutes west longitude.

She rolls her eyes and says,
'You must be supporting John McCain!'

'I am,' replies the man. 'How did you know?'

'Well,' answers the balloonist,
'everything you tell me is technically
correct, but I have no idea what to
do with your information, and I'm still
lost. Frankly, you're not much help to me.

The man smiles and responds, 'You must be for Obama.'

'I am,' replies the balloonist. 'How did you know?'

'Well,' says the man, 'You don't know where you are
or where you're going.
You've risen to where you are, due to a
large quantity of hot air. You made
a promise that you have no idea how to keep,
and now you expect me to solve
your problem. You're in exactly the same
position you were in before we met,
but, somehow, now it's my fault.'